2 year old wakes up 6 times a night!!

[TerrinaEmmett]

Hi all ...

Just registered to Supernanny tonight - am in DIRE need of advice. Our daughter just turned 2. Since she was BORN, she's been waking up crying on average between 2 to 7 times per night. If she sleeps through the night once a week, that's a good week.
I used to rock her to sleep until we moved her into her own room two weeks ago. Now I put her in her crib, give her a bottle, sit with her and when she's done I tell her to lie down and sleep now .. and within 10 to 20 minutes she's asleep.
So she's GOING TO SLEEP a lot better and faster, but that hasn't changed her waking up at night at all.
And when she wakes up it's not for anything in particular either! We've tried going through all the motions: milk? diaper? nightmare? cold? hot? soft toy not where it should be?
And the only one that can get her back to bed is ME. Daddy tries, but she keeps screaming for me. When either of us goes to her we don't pick her up, but just pat her back to sleep - which works temporarily, until she wakes up again. This happens continuously from 11am to 4am. So we only really sleep from 4am to 7 or 8, whenever she wakes up!
My husband is seriously considering sleeping in shifts so that we both get some semblance of a 'decent' nights sleep. I feel there has to be a better solution. Though we love her to bits, I don't want our days AND night to be at her mercy.
I'm so tired,exhausted and drained and I'm only a fraction of the mother I want to be for her.
To add the cherry on the icing on the top of the cake, I just found out I'm pregnant again - and am now even more desperate to find a way to resolve this soon.
I don't know what to do anymore. I just wish I knew why she was waking up - then maybe I could fix it, but how can you fix a problem without knowing what it is??

[BamZ]

Originally Posted by TerrinaEmmett

Hi all ...

Just registered to Supernanny tonight - am in DIRE need of advice. Our daughter just turned 2. Since she was BORN, she's been waking up crying on average between 2 to 7 times per night. If she sleeps through the night once a week, that's a good week.
I used to rock her to sleep until we moved her into her own room two weeks ago. Now I put her in her crib, give her a bottle, sit with her and when she's done I tell her to lie down and sleep now .. and within 10 to 20 minutes she's asleep.
So she's GOING TO SLEEP a lot better and faster, but that hasn't changed her waking up at night at all.
And when she wakes up it's not for anything in particular either! We've tried going through all the motions: milk? diaper? nightmare? cold? hot? soft toy not where it should be?
And the only one that can get her back to bed is ME. Daddy tries, but she keeps screaming for me. When either of us goes to her we don't pick her up, but just pat her back to sleep - which works temporarily, until she wakes up again. This happens continuously from 11am to 4am. So we only really sleep from 4am to 7 or 8, whenever she wakes up!
My husband is seriously considering sleeping in shifts so that we both get some semblance of a 'decent' nights sleep. I feel there has to be a better solution. Though we love her to bits, I don't want our days AND night to be at her mercy.
I'm so tired,exhausted and drained and I'm only a fraction of the mother I want to be for her.
To add the cherry on the icing on the top of the cake, I just found out I'm pregnant again - and am now even more desperate to find a way to resolve this soon.
I don't know what to do anymore. I just wish I knew why she was waking up - then maybe I could fix it, but how can you fix a problem without knowing what it is??

I'm sorry I can't offer you any advice, but just wanted to let you know you are not alone. My 3 year old son is exactly the same.
I am totally exhausted, he will go to bed between 8-8:30, but will wake numerous times in the night. He gets out of bed and comes to get me. I then have to take him back to bed and stay with him till he is asleep. If I don't time it correctly and leave too soon, he will get straight back up and come and get me again.
Sometimes I am lucky enough to get a straight 2/3 hours sleep in one stretch. But this is rare.
His dad and I have tried everything we can think of to stop him waking but nothing so far has worked.
Most nights I just climb into bed beside him, just so I can try and get some sleep. He then has a habit of pulling my hair in his sleep, which keeps me awake, so I can't win.
I am hoping that one day he will just grow out of it and stay asleep all night.
I have been told by a few people though that they know of children that have done this and once a sibling comes along (and shares their room) they stop waking. Unfortunately for me there will be no more children, but you mentioned you were pregnant, so hopefully it might work for you. I have my fingers crossed for you.
Take care xx

[TerrinaEmmett]

Hi BamZ,

Thanks for the support...it is comforting to know i'm not alone, though I wouldn't wish this on anyone else! Not so comforting to know that your son is already 3 and it still continues! How have you survived without going insane from sleep deprivation?? And I hear you on the whole 'not timing it properly' ... sometimes my husband thinks i'm overly paranoid, but we do have to time it down to the T for whatever to work, and even then it doesn't work for long anyway.
Here's hoping the new baby does help, and not worsen the situation - i mean, we can't wait to have a new baby, but how much less sleep can one have???!!

You take care too and please do let me know if you find a miracle solution!!!

[disneymom]

I am curious about your bedtime routine. When she falls asleep the first time, are you rubbing her back or singing or anything that she can't do for herself? If she always falls asleep with you in the room, she may not be able to put herself back to sleep if you are not there.

Try sitting in the hallway just outside the door at bedtime where you can't be seen, but can respond as necessary. It also helps if the child has some kind of comforting tool in the bed: stuffed animal, blanket, (my son likes one of my old t-shirts) etc.

The same thing works for bedtime as the time out. Don't talk, put them back. Choose one week when you can give up sleep and be really good about it. Each of my three childen have gone through this right about age 2. My middle child has been the worst, at age 5, I still have to walk him back to his bed a couple of times a week, but I think he might have other issues related to his adoption. It sounds terrible, but I stood outside my DD room and held the door closed while she cried herself to sleep. I only had to do it once.

Good luck. That sleep deprevation is the worst!!!

[Matilda L]

The only thing that really works is the controlled crying technique...it works a treat but you have to be consistent and stick at it to the letter...within a few days your life will be transformed...nothing is worse than hearing your child cry but after a few days you've got your life back...be strong and give it a go!!! Goodluck

[protrainer]

My baby is 15mnths old but he still wakes up every hour or two and wants to feed and I am also the only one who can soothe him and put him back to sleep. I started letting him cry it out a few weeks ago but it's not going so well. I wish I had more advice I could give you. I am going to keep trying and try to not give in and hopefully he'll get used to it. It's been 3 weeks already and he still screams every couple of hours and then I give in and go and get him.
You are not alone

[jmm]

Hi,
My two year old is much the same. I have a terrible time getting him to bed bed before 10:00pm. The only way I've been able to solve this is to cut out his naps all together. Now he will go to bed around 8:30-9:00pm. Unfortunately, he still wakes up very frequently through the night, very similar to your story. He comes and gets me, I walk him back to bed, and lie with him for a while. If it hit the magic number of minutes with him, he'll simply say night night, roll over and go to sleep. However, if I try to leave too soon, he's back to get me again within 45 minutes, and this can go on 2-3x throughout the night. He's often up for 2-3 hours when he's like this. He's not interested in getting up to play or anything like that, but he seems unable to fall asleep, even if I lie beside for the whole 2 hours.
One thing that has helped on some nights has been to ensure that he gets a very large bed time snack. I know they say not to give a late snack, or only give a light one, but it's a guarantee that he'll wake up if he hasn't had one; whereas if I give him a big snack, I at least have a chance of getting some sleep. (Also, now that his vocabulary is increasing, he asked me one night at bedtime for a banana. I told him 'no', thinking it was just a ploy. He then proceeded to tell me that he was hungry and would wake up in the night (in his own 2year old language skills). So.... we have a least a full bowl of cereal at a bare minimum, often with either a banana or minigo to go with it.
I have tried many of the sleep tactics. They all work for a short while, and then they seem to have no effect anymore. Also, I now have a new baby (she's 5 months old), and we only have one extra bedroom, so they sleep together. So, I feel like I can't do a lot of the sleep tactics anymore, as I can't risk having him wake her up, so he gets away with a lot more.
I had to stop telling stories as a bed time routine - it was too stimulating for him. Now we cuddle in front of the tv with a bedtime (age appropriate) movie or tv show. I lock him down in my arms, with a blanket and a stuffed toy, and I rock him. It has made bedtime a lot easier.
Sorry, this is kind of long, but one last tidbit to give you a little hope. I know have my second child (a daughter) and she sleeps wonderfully!!!! So, there is at least hope for the next one.
If you received any advice that you found useful, I would love to hear it.
Julie